Since I was scheduled to visit Lulu at the farm sanctuary the next day, I thought I would check in with her again to see if she was more open to talking with me than the first time. As soon as I focused on her, she quickly turned away toward the other sheep and acted like she didn't see me. It was the equivalent of seeing someone in the grocery store who you don't want to talk with, so you quickly look the other way and busy yourself with something so that you don't "notice" them. So I sat down in my vision, a short distance from her, and said, "I'm just going to sit here. We don't have to talk." Almost immediately, she came over to me as she always does in real-life, did the nose-touch thing, and then laid down right next to me. She seemed comfortable with this set-up. I wasn't sure what to do next — if I should just sit in silence, or if "thinking" to her was allowed. "Should I not talk with you?" I asked her hesitantly. "You can talk," she answered with a little softer tone. I could tell she was just exploring her comfort zone, trying her best to make amends and to see how we might make this work. Currently, that meant laying next to me and talking, but without looking at me. It felt like we were mobsters outside of Gino's Italian Deli, talking about some illicit subject without letting on that we knew each other or were actually having a conversation. I think she was just trying to "save face" in front of the other animals in her herd. "I'm sorry if anything I did caused you any trouble," I said cautiously. "It's nothing you did," she assured me. "It's just herd dynamics. I have to live with them, so need to make sure everyone is comfortable." "Okay, I understand," I said. "What would you like to talk about?" I asked. I could see her running through typical sheep topics in her mind: grazing, smelling flowers, hanging out with the other animals — and then thinking, "This is just sheep stuff and not too interesting for you." "Why did you choose to be a sheep in this life?" I asked. She let out a big sigh. Not of exasperation or irritation, but to signify rest. Being a sheep was a chance to just "be" without doing much. No expectations. Relatively few dangers or dramatic events. It was serene. She had done it before (been a sheep) and enjoyed it, so is here for another go-around. I remembered that I had just read that she and her sibling, Baboomba, came to the sanctuary because their mother rejected them. I wondered why they had set up that scenario, so asked her. "We weren't ever in any danger, because we had a plan," she explained. And by plan, she meant "master/divine plan." "Mother was to push us away so we would end up here and learn independence, to be our own people," she told the story, still without looking at me. "But it still must have been difficult to feel rejected my your mother and maybe scary to leave her," I posed. "On one level, yes. It comes with living on this planet. We feel, we are immersed, we get carried away with events. But the other level — the one we are pretty good at keeping in mind — is that there's always a plan. A reason. And we helped create it, so we know the end-game." I'm always surprised at how wise and connected other beings are about this kind of stuff as opposed to humans, who are often clueless. "Why is that, Lulu?" I wondered if she knew the answers to my last thought. "That, I don't know," she said simply and honestly. "Humans are a breed apart." "You've never incarnated as a human?" I wondered. "No," she said thoughtfully. "Not yet." And it felt like she was thinking whether or not she would ever want to do that. "When I see you tomorrow, will it be awkward for you?" I asked. "Will you be able to interact like this or like you used to?" "Business as usual," she said without elaboration, still casually looking left and right and not at me, in an effort to appear like we aren't talking. "Okay, I look forward to seeing what business as usual means to you," I said with a little laugh. "I'm pretty good with cues, so just let me know what's comfortable for you and I'll follow it. She gave a slight, pleased smile, but not in my direction. Then she got up and went to join Baboomba and Nia. Mob business completed.
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